Lessons After The First Year of Marriage

People say the first year of marriage is the toughest. I guess we've been pretty blessed so far. It feels like The Hubs and I have survived our first year and a half with a fair breeze. Needless to say, this doesn't mean we don't get our fair share of troubles from time to time. It's a huge adjustment after all --starting a new life with someone and everything that comes with them. So here are a few of the lessons (a lot of them we often think of as cliches but prove otherwise) I've learned so far:

1. "You (definitely) marry a whole family." 

I keep telling everyone time and again that I've never felt more blessed to belong to a family like my husband's. There has never been a time where I felt like I was an "outsider." My in-laws have all been very warm and loving. The Hubs, in turn, has repeatedly expressed how much he adores my own family. We've truly been lucky. However, not all newly weds can say the same. It's a common theme amongst people I know to have trouble adjusting to their new families. But this is a MUST. This is something crucial that one has a definite need to consider before getting married. Like it or not, your partner's every family ordeal, whether good or bad, will be yours as well. One needs to be ready to be PART of the family you're marrying into, and not simply expect to be a bystander. 

2. "Apologizing doesn't always mean that you're wrong and the other person is right. It just means that you value your relationship more than your ego." 

I know what you're thinking --this quote must've been taken straight out of those overly reposted typography-like images on Tumblr or Pinterest. Maybe. But that doesn't make it any less relevant. I can't begin to enumerate how many times this line of thinking has saved our relationship from having to face bigger problems out of trivial matters. It can't be helped that in any relationship, you're going to argue and find things to fight about. It's a difficult lesson to learn, but for most arguments, the both of you eventually have to realize that it's never worth to let your egos win. Saying sorry and actually meaning it is never easy, but when you truly love another person it's usually worth the sacrifice.

Bay Area (Spring 2013)

It's hard to define where "Home" is these days. But whenever we go back to the Bay Area, everything just seems to feel right. Familiar faces and places --nothing beats going back to a place you truly love. 

Some of the highlights of our trip include...

Our Little Family

I cannot emphasize enough how grateful I am to have my "little family." In the work that I do, it's not uncommon to feel burnt out and  stressed. Believe me, after three consecutive 12-hour Noc Shifts trying to keep people alive, feeling "drained" is the least of your worries. But coming home to The Hubs and The Pup is all the therapy I need. 

It's still difficult to wrap my head around on how my life and priorities have drastically changed. Not too long ago, all I would need to think about are my own self-directed needs. But now, suddenly I find my thoughts revolving around these individuals that I feel responsible for and bonded to. But it's an awesome feeling (Most of the time. Haha!). It has a comfortable sense of security to it that I'm definitely embracing. To be honest, I simply cannot wait for more (all in God's perfect time).

My every day isn't always peaches and cream, but I at least get to go home to this. And I know I'm one of the happiest people alive. I sincerely feel blessed. I can only hope and pray there will be more of this... warm cuddles, soft kisses, laughter and looks of utter welcome. No amount of material things can ever replace what we have. It all just comes full circle. And I'm forever grateful. 

It Goes On

Rejection --- we all have to go through it at some point in our lives. Whether it's in our search for the right career, the right person to be with or whatever circumstance we may face, getting a "No" for an answer is never, ever EASY to say the least. It's a right of passage that none of us would want to go through, but most definitely will experience (and may NEED to experience) quite a few times. 

The hardest part is always, ALWAYS that initial blow. It's that moment when someone or something tells you that your efforts simply aren't enough. It hurts (no kidding about that), we get into a slump and we cry (yes, we all cry, even if it's just on the inside --to some of us, it may mean bawling ugly, nose dripping while your car is pulled over to the nearest curb. Cough! Cough!). And even though we try to convince ourselves to carry on, it is in fact harder than it may seem. But it's crucial that we move on no matter what. Cry it out, rant, eat as much ice cream as you need, the important thing is you remember that all of it eventually has to STOP and you have to get yourself out of that slump.

As cliche as it sounds, things do get better eventually. We all at some point learn to get back on our feet and realize, nothing in our lives have really changed by much. And even if we feel like we've lost, there's still so much ahead of us. How the process goes, and how long it takes may very with each person. Like a virus in our system, most of the time the best way to deal with it is to simply let it run its course.

And when we are finally able to let ourselves set our burden free, things do get better. Yes, they do. We learn and we eventually let go. It's just human nature. Remember the wise words of Robert Frost, "In three words, I can sum up everything I've learned about life: IT GOES ON."

And today, we indulged in Sushi and tried weird/new tastes out of curiosity. It certainly helped. 

Happy Birthday, Daddy Terry!

Happy Birthday to the man who has few words but big actions, asks for little but gives so much, and chooses his battles but overcomes no matter what.

How I wish I can give the ol' man a big hug and a kiss on the cheek today, but unfortunately we're a whole ocean apart. I'm sure he knows he is loved. I am grateful each day that you are who you are. Cheers, Daddy!

Recipe: Meaty Zucchini Lasagna

After scoring great food finds at my favorite grocery store (Trader Joe's) yesterday, I finally gathered enough strength to return to the kitchen and cook up a storm. 

For tonight's menu, I experimented on using zucchini as a main ingredient for meaty, noodle-less lasagna. It's an easy, uncomplicated dish with a twist if you're looking for ways to eat more vegetables but can't seem to get rid of your love for meat.

I'm no expert on The Paleo Diet, but to those of you following it, this dish might just be perfect for you (if you exclude the three kinds of cheese I put in it --and of course, this is why I personally cannot thrive on this diet. I simply cannot live without my cheese!).

I honestly set my expectations low for this one, but I was pleasantly surprised that it turned out pretty good. Without further adiue, here's the first ever home-made recipe I will be sharing. Enjoy! 

Mommy Neneng

Today is the 57th birthday of a very special person, who I am proud and grateful to call, my Mommy. Here are only a few reasons that truly make her one-of-a-kind… 

5. She is GENEROUS to a fault

My brothers and I often quip that my Mom doesn't run a business, she runs a charitable institution. What a lot of people don't know, and what she will never tell others, is that this joke has so much truth to it in more ways than one.

My Mom is constantly the go-to person of family, friends and even (surprisingly) strangers when they need help. Not that my mom is this multi-millionaire with lots to spare, but even without much luxury of excess, there was never a time where she wouldn't share whatever we had to help out another person in any possible way she can. 

And yes, there were even numerous times that in her humble local fast-food place, she has helped people whom she had just met. I remember a mother and child she had helped bring to the hospital and fed free meals because they had no other family in the city or any means to go around. Over the years, I have seen her do countless good deeds without asking to be repaid and unannounced to the rest of the world. I can only wish to do half of the things she has done for others. 

4. When I think of HUMILITY, I think of her

I can't really remember a time when my Mom boasted any of her achievements or good deeds to anyone. Whenever she helps, she never expects anything in return, so she doesn't publicize it.

She grew up in modest roots in the province of M'lang, North Cotabato in the Philippines with 7 siblings. With my grandparents, (rice farmers slash vendors in the local fish market) always away from home to make a living, she was already taking care of my aunts and uncles at a young age. 

She is one of the first people I think of when I hear the words, "self-made." With no monetary inheritance to expect, my Mom worked hard to have everything she has now. Even after "moving up" economically speaking, she stays humble and has never been one to act like a "socialite." Ask her if she wants to go to fancy parties and she would say in Filipino, "No thanks. I might just feel out of place."

Perhaps, the only time she actually boasts is when it comes to us (her kids) --our achievements in school and careers-- and of course, her adorable grandkids. And you know, every great parent deserves the right to do so. In the eyes of the world, we are her pride and greatest of achievements.

3. She is a SPOILER --in a good way

My Mom, like every good mother, always puts her kids first. She loves us so much, that a lot of times, we do feel spoiled. No, she doesn't make us feel entitled or lavish us with material things (well... sometimes she may, as The Hubs would argue whenever he accompanies Mom and I on a shopping spree). But instead, she showers us with good food, an infinite supply of hugs and kisses, and always… always checks on us -whatever time it may be or wherever in the world we may be. 

This has major setbacks though, especially when it comes to the grandkids. The Hubs and I constantly fear that our future kids would end up being too spoiled under the care of my doting Mom. After all, we've already been seeing this in my brothers' kids. So when The Hubs and I recently had a conversation with her not to do the same to our future kids, she bluntly replied to our woes, "Of course I'm going to spoil your kids!" Oh well, at least she says that out of love.

2. It's easy to make her BLUSH

Give my Mom a compliment or see how she reacts whenever my Dad tries to show her affection publicly (PDA) --she turns from a dignified, and well composed woman to a bashful teenage girl in a matter of seconds -and I love it! 

One of my guy friends once saw my Mom's photo when she was younger and told her that she was so pretty. I still remember that big smile on her face and her tone of disbelief. I can't seem to explain why I find it so amusing. Maybe I just want to torture her (in a good way) from time to time. 

1. She's a child of God

Mom has always had Christ's music in her heart. One of my earliest childhood memories is hearing my mother sing Christian hymns while she bakes, does chores, showers and even to lull me to sleep. As far back as I can remember, I see her reading the Bible and praying almost, if not, every day. The last  words she utters before she dozes off at night are always, "Thank you, Lord." With her actions, I see that she is Jesus' genuine and obedient follower.

She knows she isn't perfect and has never claimed to be, but she never ceases to show me the true meaning of Christianity --that we are Saved, not by our good works or own merit, but by Faith and through God's Grace alone. That is why she is who she is -- she doesn't or rarely boast, stays so humble and is able to give us (her family) and the people around her unconditional love. 

I can go on and on about the wonderful person that she is, and no amount of space will be enough. I cannot ask for a better Mother in this world. I truly already have the BEST. No words are enough, and nothing I can give back can ever repay everything she has sacrificed for me and our whole family. Though we are thousands of miles apart, I am always proud to be her daughter. I love you and I miss you, Mom! Happy Birthday!  

LOVE

I may be a couple of days late for Valentine's, but there's not enough reason in the world not to celebrate the "Big L" everyday. 

I am thankful for LOVE, and not just the mushy, giving each other flowers and chocolates kind. I'm talking about the genuine thing that transcends through differences, time and the many obstacles that life may throw your way. The kind that makes you want to say "sorry" even if (in your mind) you're right, but you let your pride go because you know certain things are just worth it. Yes, the kind where one sacrifices sleeping in only to give the other a ride to work at 5:30 am. One where you've smelled each others' fart, but can still look each other in the eye, when parents forget their own luxuries to provide everything for their kids, or even when one goes out in the freezing cold to give their pet dog a walk because it needs to pee --these are the loving actions that need to be appreciated daily. 

In this world obsessed with commercialism and social networking, it's easy to get into the loop of spending lots of money and then showing it off to appease our egos or someone elses. Not that I'm saying there's anything wrong with showing someone how much you care about them. I just think people need to realize that "love" should be shown and appreciated not only in this day dictated by whatever confines of society, but every single day (no matter how "ordinary" it may seem). After all, it is in these ordinary things that we fail to realize how extraordinary of a loss we may have once they are gone. 

So, to all things and people that I truly LOVE -my wonderful husband, my selfless parents, my supportive siblings, friends and the rest of my family, and this amusing little pup I have - thank you and i hope you know how much I LOVE YOU.

And as for you Dear Reader, I challenge you to LOVE and BE LOVED... each and every single day. 

Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law. Romans 13:8 

Salamat! Merci! Grazie! ¡gracias THANKS!

 At 25, with a high-stress job working as a nurse and thrust into a town as different as can be from where I grew up, I've unfortunately found myself on almost a daily verge of a nervous breakdown.

There definitely has been something missing in the whole equation. After all, I really don't have it all that bad. But somehow, a lot of us find ourselves (quite too often than we'd want to) in this kind of slump... Then it dawned on me, remember that song? "Count your blessings, name them one by one." Lightbulb moment! Maybe, just maybe... it's as simple as that. Perhaps, I, like so many people right now tend to overlook the thousands of reasons to be grateful everyday. No matter how seemingly mundane certain things may be, there should ALWAYS be a reason to go on with life.

So despite hesitations of wearing my heart on my sleeve, I've found little ol' me facing myself with a challenge -to look for or recognize everyday things to have a thankful and happy heart. This will be a daily journey to document life's tiny miracles with the hope that I not only draw inspiration to myself, but to others around me as well (even if no one cares to read these posts haha). It's a bit cliche, but how many times have we heard it before? Let the light begin to shine in me.

And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving THANKS to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:17